Essential Reading for Cyclists

The weather is dreary. There is not much to see or hear on the TV apart from politicians debating Br*xit and pundits opining on Br*xit. The cinema is expensive at £14 quid a seat, a pint of beer is a fiver everywhere except Wetherspoon’s, and it is even becoming dangerous to take a constitutional what with the risk of tripping over discarded mattresses and fridges. The only thing that is holding us together is graffiti.

Never fear, if you are vaguely interested in bikes and biking, The Wattmeister has come up with a superb reading list to brighten up the dark months.

Each tome has been chosen for one of the seven literary themes.

Good vs Evil……………….The Magnificent Sevenspeed/The Seventh Sprocket of the Samural. (Rural community hire mercenary mechanics to protect them from avaricious bike shop gang).

Rags to Riches…………….Oliver Twistgrip. (Orphaned posh boy goes from singlespeed to basic gearing with help of benign benefactor).

The Quest……………………Lord of the Big Rings.  (A trilogy comprising; The Fellowship of the Granny Ring; The Two Chainrings; Return of the KOM).

Comedy……………………….The Headwind in The Willy Wavers. (Conceited Strava addict becomes obsessed with Di2).

Tragedy……………………….The Picture of Marco Pantani. (Super talented pro cyclist adopts every vice while the picture in his attic reflects his disintegration)

Rebirth………………………..Candide Chooses Campagnolo. ( Lovestruck bastard nephew undergoes all sorts of trial and tribulations but still fails to get Italian manufacturer’s gear to synchronise).

Voyage and Return……..Gone with the Tailwind. (Drama involving woman who loves another man’s carbon bike more than her own husband’s titanium steed. Terrible things ensue…..they even come off Strava!).

Enjoy

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