Pre-inauguration Survival Checklist

It takes on to know one….so the saying goes. To wit The Wattmeister is convinced that Donald Trump is a nutcase (there are more out than in). Therefore, on the day before the syrup’s* inauguration, and in the event that his fishy finger slips on the dreaded red button, it is imperative to have a cyclist’s survival plan.

  1. Recommission the old steel bike. It will not melt as quickly as carbon. Make sure it has been serviced and fitted with as many water bottle carriers as possible.
  2. Stockpile energy gels, dried figs and soft toilet paper…(Wattmeister Law of Discharge….the more figs, the more toilet paper).
  3. Do not forget basic kit such as power meter, heart rate monitor and cadence sensor.
  4. Fully charge all GPS tracking devices and fit front hub dynamo in order to load up to Strava for as long as possible. (for those of you who have not yet embraced Strava….do it now…like Trump, the future is ORANGE).                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    .strava                 trump
  5. Brush your teeth.                                                                                                                                      *syrup of figs = wig.


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